The chant "having none, partner?" or "no spades?" whenever partner fails to follow suit used to be a common one, and perfectly legal. For a while it was made illegal, although many players apparently failed to notice. Now the 2008 laws have made it legal again.
Although it is now legal to enquire, the latest laws add the warning that, by asking, you may be imparting "Unauthorised Information". What this means is that if partner gleans from your question, or the way you ask it, that you are surprised he failed to follow suit then he may be able to gain some inference from that surprise - for example that you don't have great length yourself. To allow such an inference to influence your play is totally illegal.
The advice from an eminent EBU expert on Laws and Ethics is to get into the habit of always asking partner "having none?" if he fails to follow suit (and always using the same form of words). If you always do it then no one can gain any inference from the fact that you have chosen to do it on this particular occasion.
The current rule is that anyone can ask just about anyone else whether or not they have a card of the suit led, except for poor old dummy. If dummy has forfeited his rights then he cannot ask anyone. If he is still in possession of his rights he can only ask declarer. Dummy is expressly forbidden, under any circumstances, to ask a defender because to do so may attract declarer's attention to the fact that someone failed to follow suit.
Whether or not it's a good idea to ask an opponent is up to you. If an opponent has revoked and you refrain from asking then there is possibility the revoke may become established, which could end up to your advantage. Whether that counts as gamesmanship I leave to your individual conscience. Whatever policy you adopt, you should again ensure that you don't give information to partner by your asking or failing to ask.
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